Lego pirates index

In a hypothetical internet poll, I reckon Lego Pirates would be voted at least the Eighth Best Series of Oddball Anti-Fables Featuring Aristocratic Plastic Swashbucklers on the Web. Catch up with the saga using this handy one-stop index page, if you like.

1. A Nautical Lego Photo Story
When Rupert and Geoffrey are imprisoned by the Governor, Cap'n Smythe and his glamorous assistants mount a rescue mission. Will their audacious plan be a success? Yes.

2. The Cannon (Poster - Elton John)
After a nine-month break, the Pirates return with a raft of swizzy new production values that literally make love to your eyes as you read (note: not literally). After his ship is damaged by a mysterious cannon ball, the Governor hunts down the pirates he suspects are responsible. Nobody learns a valuable lesson.

3. The Monkey (Poster - Quantum Leap)
Nigella wants to send a greetings card to her incarcerated boyfriend Rupert, but Bernard the chimp has other ideas. About as much fun as it sounds.

4. The Disguise (Poster - Die Hard)
The Governor sends his new Commander on an undercover mission to infiltrate Skull Island. The twist is that things go a bit wrong, unexpectedly.

5. The Ghost (Poster - Famous Five)
Erm, there's this ghost, right, in the Governor's dungeon, and he's... not very happy. It seemed like a good idea at the time.

6. The Mast (Poster - Six Feet Under)
Commander Barnes and Lieutenant Sanders damage the Governor's ship whilst larking about on the ocean. Meanwhile, Bos'n Julian undergoes inadvisable 'character development'.

7. The Niece (Poster - Shed Seven)
The arrival of a hastily-imported new character - the Governor's niece - robs Nigella of her feminine monopoly. Passions run high. The status quo is threatened. Also, there's a very cheap joke about penises. Something for everyone, then.

8. The Day After (Poster - 8 Mile)
Or, if you prefer, Episode 7 Part II. Expect violence, passion and nuanced social satire. Then prepare yourself for disappointment.